The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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