Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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