The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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