we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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