sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
