don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
