She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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