Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I lost the right to judge tonight
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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