ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize