My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
