Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
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The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
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Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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