carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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