he shaved USA in his pubs
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
