I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
