how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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