all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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