i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I seem to have left my pride at pride
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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