I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
