You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
