He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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