our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
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Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
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My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.