the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I should be sponsored by Trojan
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
