I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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