Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
