Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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