I looked at my own cervix.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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