she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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