he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Randomize
