So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
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im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
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my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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