Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
