saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
