Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
he had hair everywhere except his balls
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