If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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