i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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