Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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