I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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