Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
