FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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