did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
