I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
