All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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