You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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