it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
