when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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