don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
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he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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