Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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