ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Let the clothes fall where they may.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
