He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
