So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize