mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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