I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
